Singapore taxi

Starting or having a conversation with a taxi driver here in Singapore can be difficult for 3 reasons:

1) he’s a complaining type person by complaining the government’s regulation or even why the pedestrian walk very slow or
2) he doesn't want to talk at all or
3) he talks but you won’t understand ( or in other language ) – at the end it can be very impossible to tell him to be quiet.

2.30pm, Saturday - on the way to IKEA
Me : “Afternoon uncle”
Driver : “fhzxsgtrsdj” ( don’t know what he said )
“Ikea please”
“huh”
“wow, today is very hot”
“…. Huh.”
(quiet)
“ excuse me uncle, do you know where is queensway shopping centre, famous place to buy the sport shoe?”
“don’t know leh”
“ ok – my friend told me it’s near the IKEA”
“I told you don’t know – I don’t wear sport shoe”
“ok”
Silence until arrived in IKEA
“how much uncle?”
“you see loh”
(Grrr…….)

8.40am, Tuesday - on the way to office and suddenly raining
Me: “morning uncle”
Driver: “morning – ni yau ci na li?”
“OCBC centre” – I just told him where I wannna go without knowing what is the meaning of his question while wiping my face with tissue paper
“Ni hao ma?” – This one easy – everybody know
“I’m fine uncle and how about you”
“Ni zhao sir mer gong zie xie japor?”
“Sorry uncle, I don’t understand – can you please repeat your question in English?”
“Heh. But how come you can understand the first time I asked you. Are you Chinese?”
“Yes, I am”
“But how come you Chinese hah but cannot speak Chinese?”
“My families don’t speak Chinese”
“But you must speak Chinese because heh – I told you haa… you al Chinese – you speak Chinese lor – if all Chinese like you hah speak English then who speak Chinese?”
( What a morning … )

09.20pm, Friday - on the way simpang bedok to meet shafik and friends
Me: “Hallo uncle”
Driver: “hallo2x… how are you?”
“I am fine thanks – can we go to simpang bedok please?”
“ok ok.. simpang bedok hah?”
“yes uncle – thank you”
“go makan in simpang bedok hah?”
“Yes uncle”
“how come hah you makan so far?”
“I want to meet my friend”
“haiya.. how come meet friend also very far?”
“my friend live in bedok area”
“must be a girl-ah”
“no uncle – my good friend”
“aiya… must be girl lor... don’t lie to uncle lah… can’t be far far far away you makan to bedok not seeing any girl, now is fliday some mol”
“( smile only )”
“are you local?”
“no uncle”
“you live singapore?”
“yes”
“how long-ah?”
“First time for me to live here in 1996”
”so long-ah, are you single?”
“yes uncle”
“aiya – how come single, you are handsome, find singapore girl lah, many girls here-ah, try one lah”
“no – thanks uncle, I got one already”
“no problem lah, not married some more, no matter wha, even you married-ah, you also can try, I told you wha, girl happy, you happy – why wolly?”
( what an advise )